so beautiful....

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passing change

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Leaves fell across the darken land

Fall’s bleeding into trees we remain laying alone despite our beliefs

Burning into us we strive to grow and with our blacken tears falling from our eyes we remain alone

passing by us in our upmost dreams I’ll wait until the days start to change with your midnight wings

come with me and we'll grow, burning into us we strive to grow and with our blacken tears falling from our eyes we remain alone

Always left alone, you'll stay cold in your day dreams were left alone. Cold.

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time has passed by since my last update, but the reason is beacuse i dont really have much to say besides boring details about volleyball but some kid named daniel wanted me to up date. ha just kidding daniel i love you, you are awesome and a super nice guy!

we have had 6 wins in a row or 5 something like that. i might be wrong. but still either way is awesome. AFI has won on 945 3 days in a row now! and erika and i have both been on the radio live voting for them and last night i siad " afi baby" and erika said " A....F....I" it was funny it was kinda slow sounding but we knew it was eachother. and we are doing it again tonight and we got other people to do it aswell to help them out... so if you read this before its 9 then call 1 713 212 5945!!!! and vote AFI ALL THE WAY!! it will be grand.... well i went to my dads last week to see and hang out at the new house! its beautiful i like it alot. and my dad is aweosme so it made the trip wonderful. and my step mom rules! IM PASSING ALL MY CLASSES!

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to who do you respond to when your dreams seem so real and your inlove with someone but you dont feel it.?

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how do you feel when he touches your right arm do you want to turn and leave or stay and ask for more. -{-{-{-{-

hmm i have been listening to alot of "the killers" and i like them alot, i like what they say and how the music supports it. its neat to listen to.

OH MAN IF YOU KNOW ME THEN YOU KNOW I DONT REALLY DRESS UP I HANG OUT IN T-SHIRTS AND JEANS AND THATS REALLY IT.. WELL SINCE IM IN VOLLEYBALL AND WE HAVE A GAME TOMORROW WE HAVE TO DRESS UP NO JEANS NO T-SHIRTS!! O MAN! I DONT KNOW WHAT IM GOING TO DO IM DEAD! HAHA BUT I WILL FIND SOMETHING TO WEAR! DONT WORRY ! BUT DONT MAKE FUN OF ME!!!!!

alright im off to do homework and shower. so i hope you all have wonderful dreams to where you wake up feeling refreashed and new like a baby! i love you all and have a wonderful rest of the week.

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- jess jess-

hey everyone! man oh man i have volleyball two a days this whole week we are going to die but in the end we will over come it! yes! thats what i keep telling myself! i went to go see "the village" tonight with erika and matthew and it wasnt as good as i was wishing it would be.... but what can you do! it was fun though being with erika and matthew they are so awesome! well im going to bed i will leave you will something you can dream about! :)
godbless
farewell
                                                                                                                        jessie

UNDERSTAND

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miss your touch upon my skin
wish it was the same way as back then
come close hold my hand whisper softly again and again
watch close, dreams now would be the upmost
the thought of you and her destroy me
cant show it because then you'd know
how i really feel inside
my heart pounds when your around
wish you knew that what i have is true and only for you.

wish you knew how i really feel
i say it joking, but it's real
to shy to confront you, scared of what you'd do
when im with you it feels so right
i just wish once i could kiss you goodnight
when you read this i hope you know its you
then just maybe my dreams will come true.

DARK ROOM-MATE

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what is it
what is love what is fear
what is real is it what you touch or what you feel?
im lost within my thought
dreaming of our past
and thinking ahead
i hope you see how i feel
come with me, and help me see
true love and is this meant to be?

ABOUT YOU Your full name: Jessica Marie Jeans Age:: 15 Height:: 5’3" Natural hair colour:: blond(e)and some red and some brown and some other colors Eye colour:: green/blue/ they change with what I have on Number of siblings:: 1 full blood brother and 2 step sisters and 3 half sisters and 1 half brother Glasses/contacts?:: I have glasses but I never use them Piercings:: my ear and my belly used to be…. Tattoos:: not at the moment, but in a couple years Braces?:: nope never had them FAVOURITE Color:: yellow. Pink and black… and yellow and green!! Band:: A.F.I Song::um I have so many but I think right now “lady” by “styx” that sounds wonderful! Video game:: mario TV show:: I don’t really watch T.V but wheni m with Erika I watch “ that 70’s show” and its funn. Movie::nightmare before christmas, billy Madison, happy Gilmore, crazy beautiful, saving private ryan. Book:: I don’t remember the last book I even got to read.. hobbit maybe… Food:: mexican!! Game on a cell phone:: bowling or sky dive CD cover:: The one I saw in matthew’s truck when Erika and I laughed so hard!! haha Flower:: white tulip Scent:: the mares, I love getting in matthews truck and wearing his hoodies!! And I like gas, and dream by gap.. animal:: monkeys.. and wolves Comic book:: spider man Cereal:: I really am not sure what it is called.. sorry. Website:: google.. and anything weird! Cartoon:: Tazz DO YOU Play an instrument?:: some guitar im learning a little stuff... flute..and a little drums.. not good at all though ha Watch TV more than 60 hours a week?:: heck no I don’t like T.v that much I like movies!!. Like to sing?:: yea it gives me a sense of freedom its fun when you get into the music to!!! That’s why I like concerts so much!. Have a job?:: no Have a cell phone?:: yeah it broke though so my mom is sending me one. Like to play sports?:: I love any sports I used to play soccer but I hurt my knee and I couldn’t play for a while and no that I can play im into other things.. volleyball softball and I love playing football!! Anything at all I will play Have a boyfriend/girlfriend?::Yea Have a crush on someone?:: yes Live somewhere NOT in the united states?:: not yet Have more than 5 TVs in your house?::Yes Im getting a theater in my new house!! You can all come! Have any special talents/skills?::yea but they are special and secret’s! ha not really I write that’s really it not may people know besides sarah Shelton and Erika I guess… Excercise daily?::yea I kinda most of the tiem its everyother day… Like school?:: no. against all my objections i am forced to attend. CAN YOU Sing the alphabet backwards?:: nope im not that good guys you will learn in time Stand on your tip toes without wearing shoes? Yeah and walk Speak any other language?:: I knew some French but now all I know are some bad words in Spanish Go a day without food?:: yes I have Stay up for more than 24 hours?:: pss yea! Who doesnt Read music, not just tabs?:: no I learn by sounds… Roll your tongue?:: sometimes Eat a whole pizza?:: pat came over one time and brought a pizzia and Erika and I forced ourselves to eat all of it haha it sucked after that we were sick! HAVE YOU EVER Snuck out of the house?:: yeah im a loser… Cried to get out of trouble?:: yea I while ago Gotten lost in your city?:: yea dallas all the time everything looks the same. Seen a shooting star?:: yes maybe about 4 Been to any other countries besides the united states?: Canada but I think that is part of the U.S haha imnot that smart. Had a serious surgery?:: uh nah im not serious Stolen something important to someone else?::Not that im sure of… Solved a rubiks cube?:: yea but my brother helped me I think or he cheated I was young and believe everything.. ha. Gone out in public in your pajamas?:: Yes Cried over a girl?:: yeah Cried over a boy?:: yes Kissed a random stranger?:: Yeah haha for some money but it was cool bc after that I got to know him better and he was awesome.. Hugged a random stranger?:: yeah..life wouldn’t be wonderful without doing it and my life is really wonderful Been in a fist fight?:: yea withmy brother a lot my whole life has been a fight haha its so much fun fighting with him he is awesome love him a lot! Been arrested?:: gotten yelled at by cops for our hotel room being to load Done drugs?:: No. Had alcohol?:: YES!!!! Laughed and had milk come out of your nose?:: nope not yet I will a day to come Pushed all the buttons on an elevator?:: pssYEAH!! That’s awesome, did it to my dad once Gone to school only to find you had the day off because of a holiday/etc?:: no that wouldn’t be cool but if I did I would break in and steal the bell.. and run around the school andyell and sing haha Swore at your parents?:: Yea Been to warped tour?:: no Kicked a guy where it hurts?:: no not meaning to I crossed my legs one time and got hunter alittle bit just enough to get him to move.. haha I cried though it made me sad Been in love?:: Yeah Been close to love?::yea Been to a casino?:: no not yet Ran over an animal and killed it?:no if I did I would die Broken a bone?: yes Gotten stitches?::don’t remember. Had a waterballoon fight in winter?:: oh YEAH! Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour?:: no thanks I don’t like milk. Made homemade muffins?:: yeah.. Bitten someone?:: yes. Been to disneyland/disneyworld?::no I want to really bad More than 5 times?::no haven’t been once Been to niagra falls?:: lets go now! Burped in someones face?:: yeah Gotten the chicken pox?:: yeah WHENS THE LAST TIME YOU Brushed your teeth:: an hour ago Went to the bathroom:: 46 min and 38 sec ago Saw a movie in theaters:: shrek II, just got home from it went with my little brother and sister cool people!. Read a book:: uh don’t remember that’s sad Had a party:: a while a go im a loser.. but I went to sara’s and went swimming two weeks ago, and it was fun! Had a slumber party:: a while ago Made fun of someone:: just about 20 min ago.. cynde! haha Tripped in front of someone:: 2 min ago Went to the grocery store:: 4 day 23 hours 24 min and 9sec! Got sick:: a long time ago Cursed:: about 2 days ago PICK ONE Fruit/vegetables:: fruit Black/white:: black Lights on/lights off:: off TV/movie:: movie Car/truck:: suv Body spray/lotion:: body spray Cash/check:: cash Pillows/blankets:: blankets Headache/stomach ache:: both bc that’s the best! Hah no thanks Paint/charcoal:: paint, I love it, erikas mom is awesome! And I like to finger paint! Chinese food/mexican food:: mexican Summer/winter:: winter Snow/rain:: rain Fog/misty:: misty Rock/rap:: rock Meat/vegetarian:: meat Boy/girl:: boy Chocolate/vanilla:: vanilla Sprinkles/icing:: sprinkles Cake/pie:: cake French toast/french fries:: french fries Strawberries/blueberries:: strawberries Ocean/swimming pool:: ocean until a shark eats one of my legs then I guess then I will join you in the pool. Hugs/kisses:: kisses. All! Cookies/muffins:: muffins p33n/bewbz:: I like the sounds of bewbz Wallet/pocket:: pocket Window/door:: windows Emo/goth:: I don’t mind both are okay to listen to but AFI Pink/purple:: pink Cat/dog:: dogs! Long sleeve/short sleeve:: short sleeve Pants/shorts:: jeans or skirts Winter break/spring break:: winter break Spring/autumn:: autumn Clouds/clear sky:: clear Moon/mars:: aliens . FRIENDSHIP How many friends do you have?:: none im a loser.. just kidding I have the best ones out there and you know who you are and you rock! What are their names?::they don’t have names I make them up.. sorry.. Do you have a best friend?:: yes. Have you ever liked one of your friends?:: yeah Do you have more guy friends or more girl friends?:: more guy friends I like guys better bc right now at this age im not trying to sounds rude or that im better then you but I don’t like how some are so into there self’s Have you ever lost a friend?:: yes Have you ever gone to an amusement park with a friend?:: yeah. Whats an inside joke between you and a friend?:: that wouldn’t make it an inside… Have you ever gotten in a big arguement with a friend?:: no im not a fighter im a lover.. but I have gotten into disagreements..no guns though Whats the nicest thing youve ever done for a friend?::helped then with something.. or gotten them something but I once there was this kid who some other boys pushed down and stuff and I yelled at thema dn called them names and help the other guy pick up his stuff… I thought that was nice?. Whats the nicest thing a friend has ever done for you?::been there for me is the best thing they can do!. Do you miss any of your old friends?:: yeah. What friend have you known the longest?:: well… Lauren moore, but we are not as close as we used to be. For good reasons if you knews us back in the day you would understand.. Do you regret anything youve done to a friend?:: nothing I have done to them but something I have done with them. How often do you spend time with your friends?:: when I can I love being with them! They are amazing! Do any of your friends drive?:: yeah Has a friend of yours ever died?:: no but I know a lot of people who have past and I was friends with the person who was close to the one who past.. if that made any sense Whats the dumbest thing youve done with a friend?:: oh dang gotten drunk.. I feel so bad saying that.. but I hope you don’t judge me I have change sense then! What do you think your friends think of you?:: that I have a gay laugh! Haha its great I love my friends! I hope you like me! LOVE AND ALL THAT CRAP Have you ever been in love?::Yes If you have, with who?:: Jeffrey Are you single?:: no right now Are you in a relationship?:: Yeah If so, for how long?:: 4 months Do you believe there is someone for everyone?:: if everyone believes there is someone for them then they will find that someone! What is your idea of the best date?::Sky diving or something crazy to not make it so personal and to get to see there fun side then the next date the beach! What was your first kiss like?:: ha I was about 5 haha I was a boy lover! Ha How old were you when you got your first kiss?:: i dont know...not young Do you think love is a load of crap?:: no way I think it is beautiful Whats the best experience youve ever had with the opposite sex?:: well… I don’t kiss and tell sorry and don’t think anything bad bc im not like that! But lets just say I will never forget! If you are single, have you had any boyfriends/girlfriends before?:: yea I have a lot of bf’s but matthew mares has had more gf’s then anyone I know! He is so awesome- pimp! Have you ever been dumped?:: once but it was all good after awhile! Have you ever dumped someone?:: yeah I have dumped a lot of people Whats the most sexual thing youve done with the opposite sex?:: don’t kiss and tell but only one person knows! Haha and it’s the person I was with WHAT DO YOU THINK OF: Slippers:: bunnys Hat:: so awesome Hard:: woodfloors Free:: spirit Space:: star’s Taste:: fruit Good charlotte:: Im a loser! Red:: lips Deep:: dark dream Heart:: yoga Cord:: chemo Cheese:: umm nah Rain:: playing in the rain, Work:: make it fun! Pedal:: to the gas Head:: johnaton want haha Bed:: dreams Fluff:: davey Hardcore:: carey at the blindside show when he hit the cop… so I hear Race:: cars Knife:: razorblades Jump:: skydive I.... am:: always trying to have fun want:: to see someone really bad! need:: to dream crave:: a clearer image of Jesus- kept that love:: Someone very special to me! hate:: judgmental people did:: crazy things feel:: in comfort miss:: Matthew and Erika! am annoyed by:: judgmental people would rather:: have more love am tired of:: not being around my friends will always:: follow God SILLY STUFF What is your favourite genre of music?:: rock or anything I listen to while in the truck with matthew ilike all of his music What time is it now?:: 3:07 What day is it?:: friday Whens the last time you called someone?::uh about 1 hour ago How much money do you have right now?:: 4 dollars im not with my dad Are you hungry?:: nope Whatcha doin?:: nothing Do you like parades?:: nope Do you like the moon?::oh yea good for they eyes Isnt cup a funny word when you repeat it over and over?:: no I don’t really think so If you could have any magical power what would it be?::fly! Have you ever had a picnic?:: yeah I have after school a few days this past year Did you ever have one of those skip-its when you were young?:: i still have it What about sock em boppers?::yeah my dad got them for my brother and I thought it would stop us from hurting eachother so much ahha it was fun! Even when he was sleeping!!.. Are you wearing any socks right now?:: no DO YOU THINK YOU ARE funny?:: ya I have my moments pretty?:: sometimes sarcastic?:: yeah I got it from my dad which is the best person ever lazy?:: no only when im sick in bed hyper?:: yea sometimes friendly?::yea evil?:: no smart?:: I can be if I try. strong?:: Yea talented?:: when I want to try dorky?::Yea when im around certain people FOR OR AGAINST suicide:: AGAINST. love:: for drunk drivers:: strongly against. airplanes:: for war:: for canada:: against united states::for rock music:: strongly for. gay marriage:: strongly against school:: against surveys:: i am neutral parents:: I need my dad! And my mom gives me good comfort!!! I love them cars:: for killing:: some just need the killing but not me right now britney spears:: strongly against.cant sing and is fake no thanks… coffee:: for pants:: yea they are fun WOULD YOU EVER Sky dive?:: of course Play strip poker?:: i have Run away?:: i have Curse at a teacher?:: yeah I have Not take a shower for a week?:: no I couldnt Ask someone out?:: idont know I have to like them alot Lie to someone to make them think better of you?:: no I want people to like me for who I am Visit a foreign country for more than a month?:: yeah Go scuba diving?:: yeah Write a book?:: not a book but I have written poems and stuff and I would Become a rockstar?:: heck yea so I can meet davey Have casual sex?:: haha how do you know I don’… haha so just kidding no thanks you never! LAST QUESTIONS What shampoo do you use?:: dove, herbal, um anything that smells good What kind of computer do you have?:: lap top Do you like to throw popcorn at people in the movies?::ha if I know them Or just make out?:: don’t mind but I have to like the person and nothing to big to make people want to kick your chair How many posters do you have in your room?::4 or 5 How many cds do you have?:: a lot but most of my songs I burn on to my computer What time is it now?:: 3:18